I broke up before my birthday, because it was not going the way I wanted it to go for a pretty long time. It was not really anyone’s fault, and I don’t blame anyone for it, and I do still cherish the wonderful times we had while we were happily together.

My parents were in the middle of a divorce, it’s not something I’ld like to comment on as it’s not really my place, and I couldn’t really do anything about it. I’ve not invited people over to my place for a very long time, because I’m not too proud of what it has become.

I quit my job the beginning of last year, I’ll never go back to it, because it was getting too boring for me, and if I ever want to do it again, I’ll do it in a different way, one that will be more fulfilling for me.

Nowadays, I’m still left with many good friends, which is great, because not too many people that I know have many great friends. Unfortunately, since then, I’ve changed a little here and there. For one, I’ve been slightly less forgiving with my comments. For those who have known me long enough, I’m probably somewhere near that rebellious rude little fucker when I was around 19.

Basically, if you were one of the unfortunate ones whom I met from say, around ‘08, I was not exactly the same person I was before that. Then again, I have always been relatively nice enough to people to warrant a blind eye being turned when I say or do nasty things, so it’s actually not that bad, but I just wanted to say that could have been a much nicer person, if you had met me on a normal day.

I go to work with somewhat proper working attire shoes, pants and shirts, to show that I am serious about the job. Save the hair, I tried to lose the colours and do it black, but doing that really just made me lose my identity, so I kept the hair, the earring and the rings.

It’s not exactly easy to continue working as I have been for past year, there’s responsibilities from the job, ungodly expectations to meet, impossible tasks, family quarrels being mixed with work, not to mention falling out of love and profits. But I’m pretty proud of the decision I made to help out in the family business, considering that I have been pretty lucky in both of my businesses. It’s looking pretty stable now, with everyone trying to get it back on track, and I would love to expand it overseas. I am going to be the youngest, most eligible prince of fire fighting in the 7 seas! Save for my brother, if he decides to help out full time, then I will be the second youngest, but STILL the most eligible prince of fire fighting! : x

I wear two rings on my left hand to remind myself that I had loved and have been loved before, they will be there until the day I find a new person to love and be loved. I am sure that one day, I will be able to find this special person, who can reciprocate my love. As I have always been, I don’t care what other people say about putting too much effort to love another person, or if this person will ever appear in my life, or if I made the wrong decision with my last love. If I love again, I will put everything into it. I have done it once; I can do it again and again and again! Preferably not so many “agains” of course, one would be more than sufficient. I am confident that to say that, one day, I will be able to find such a person, and I will be able to make my special person smile and be happy with me for the rest of my life, as she will be able to make me smile and love her for the rest of her life.

I think I’ve finished almost everything I wanted to say, and finally for myself; it’s about time I fixed myself, since I’m pretty good at coming up with solutions and I have always been neglecting myself. I’m going to learn driving *gasp* by the end of this year, so that I can work sufficiently enough extra hours to earn optimise my “time spent in office” vs “time spent outside office”. Don’t worry guys, I won’t become a workaholic *HA!* I’ll probably be home by 7+.

Note to self: You wrote this entry, to remember the good days that you once had, and the great days you will create for yourself! If you’re in a rut, read this again, don’t give in to bad emotions, because you know, every second spent being unhappy, is a second wasted on being happy, and being happy is the most important thing to you! Don’t waste it! You’re not going to live long enough to regret wasting it!

There! I feel so much better! Take that, and that and that! You stupid 25 things about me meme!

To me, good passwords are like works art, and they take time; You take something only you can understand, and abstract it in a way, that only you can remember it. When you have a list of passwords at your disposal, you’ll be amazed at how much you can tell from passwords.

qwerty, asdfg, 12345, 54321, <something easy to type>

Obviously, this person can’t be bothered with security, and thinks that whatever is stored in the computer can’t pretty much do any harm to him. What he doesn’t know is that, identity theft is really common on the internet.

andrew1980, mich2349, mac40na, <a name of a close person>

ef1030r, sba3482d, nokia7270, bmws500, <number plate of car, mobile phone>

hotdog84, cheeseburgerz, cokelite, drp3pp3r, <name of favourite food>

I can go on and on and on and on, but you get the gist of it. If any of the following looks familiar, ditch it. I should probably write a serious article but have to go change all my passwords.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3PmfNbo5Jro

So anyway, I have been called a thief, a selfish coder and some other nasty names all in this whole translation adventure. I estimate probably like 95% the community doesn’t care, and the other 5% hates my guts for the things that I didn’t do.

I suppose most people will be angry at this, especially since I can smell my effort there but I’m not rightfully credited, but as they say, easy come easy go, what can you expect from about a week’s of work? : D~

Anyway, there will not be an english patch or a link to the english patch here, and since I’m not in the soc team anymore, so don’t ask me for it. I don’t think there will be any more monster hunter related posts until I get a copy of MH3 on the wii.

Considering I watched this after Saikano it’s pretty good.

So, I’ve broken down all known problems in life into a VERY simple diagram. It’s totally idiot proof.

Other than the fact that I really need to destress from all the work, this really does solve all your problems. Or at least you can use this diagram to stop blaming your limp left hand, your relatives, your friends, your pets, your computer blahblahblahblah.

She hugged me as I was buying drinks, I pulled her away. If she hugged me anymore, I would have cried.

I can’t be that dumb to go back to her right? I can’t get another shot in the heart again. But somewhere between getting tipsy and dancing on the dance floor, I messaged her to hug me again, with lots of help from Steve, she came back, and we hugged. And I cried. I cried like there was no tomorrow.

And so we’re back, for better or worst.

So today was pretty boring, I got ambushed by Shin this afternoon, or rather, my ps2 got ambushed by Shin. The dvd guy from malaysia came, finally, some form of haste from them, though quality of April Snow was so sucky that I think I can draw better than the encoded file on the dvd.

Mana tried to con me to go ktv, which I think I will be happy to do so tomorrow, MeiMei was trying to get jio me for something she didn’t know if she was going, which was quite weird, but nice. And I ended up meeting Steve to eat at Clementi.

In conclusion, I so entirely managed to sleep till 2pm, watch DevilMan, The Transporter 2, the last 2 episodes of Sex and The City, and play some Magna Carta. And of course, miss mambo.

The whole freaking world is not online today. The must be a plague or something going on that I haven’t caught onto yet. Oh wait a second, Sanado is already at Tokyo, and Charmaine en route to Hong Kong, Chole is out with her friends, so is MeiMei. AHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh no one left liao! Tamade, I need to know more females, or I need to be awake at the correct times : D

It feels like an eternity, waiting for the exams to end.

Not being able to sleep in peace doesn’t quite help too.

I can’t help wondering how life is like a huge jigsaw puzzle, and my relationship is like a jigsaw piece; it seems to fit, and yet, it doesn’t exactly. It completely blends in with the surroundings, the tone is perfect, the shape is right, but when you slot it in, it takes a little bit more effort than usual, which is conveniently attributed to a slight manufacturer fault, thus clouding a small, seemingly unnoticeable void.

And slowly, you continue to look for pieces which fit in with the rest of the jigsaw, as it was supposed to be.

There are times, where it would seem that the rest of the puzzle is a little tougher than expected, and a short rest is required to clear your thoughts.

There are also times, when you try hard to combine larger pieces together, to fit into corners of the jigsaw. Ever so pleased with yourself on such a success, you venture upon greater heights, whirling back and forth with much gusto, as you see your re-creation taking form.

Much care is often required for such a task, especially so if your foundations aren’t firm enough, an accidental brush of an over anxious elbow, a knock to the fragile legs of the table, always manages to put one back in schedule.

It perpetually pleases you to know that the piece you scoured for, is still firmly holding on to the rest of the pieces around it, while the rest of the flimsy ones fall onto the ground. You pick those pieces up and you start over again.

But when you are nearing the end of your puzzle, you slowly realise that something seems to be a little off. A part of the puzzle doesn’t seem to be solvable. You start taking out bits and pieces of the puzzle to look for the missing link.

You search everywhere, except the place where you least expect it to be.

Then it finally dawns upon you.

You look around, in disbelief, unwilling to accept such a twist. After all, it was the piece that held the rest of the puzzle when all other pieces were scattered, it was the piece, that very piece which blended with its surroundings.

“It cannot be”, you tell yourself.

“There can’t possibly be another slot for this piece!”, you exclaim.

Grudgingly, you take out the piece reluctantly, keeping it in your hands, in hopes that you will never need to find the other piece.

You fit other pieces first, and gradually, you find that there are fewer and fewer options. You pretend that you don’t see the pieces which are similar to the one you are holding, but eventually, you will pick it up.

Fearing for the worst, you pick it up and you find that it is, indeed, a better fit.

And this is where you let go of the piece that you held, ever so tightly in your hands…

You get so angry at the entire jigsaw, that you slam the table, scattering the perfect pieces, angry at yourself for choosing that particular jigsaw.

As the anger subsides, you realise that, this is, indeed, the jigsaw that you chose, because the jigsaw represents a part you, which you chose to live as.

Slowly, you being to pick up the fallen pieces of your scattered life, and you begin life anew.

Maybe after a long while when you are at the end of the jigsaw, you will forget that piece that caused your joys and sorrows.

Maybe you will find another precious piece to hold.

Maybe you won’t be able to fully complete the jigsaw now that it’s all over the place.

Maybe…

I am so pleased that I finally managed to finish writing this. I feel so much better and I should be able to sleep now. I am such a good writer : )

Please do not show any indifference towards me after reading this, I resent that alot. I simply do not want people to keep asking what’s on your mind these days. If you want to tell me something, leave it here.